Friday 19th July 2019 - 19:20:59 

20 Shots Of Scotch

 

A guy runs into a bar and says, "Bartender, quick! Give me 20 shots of your best Scotch"!

So the bartender lines up 20 shots of his best Scotch and watches this guy down one after the other.

"Man," the bartender says, "I've never seen anyone drink shots that fast"!

"You'd drink them that fast too if you have what I have," the guy says.

"Oh my God," says the bartender, "what do you have"?

"50 cents

Quotes for Today:

How did a fool and his money GET together?
 


I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.
Richard Jeni  


I always turn to the sports page first. The sports page records people's accomplishments; the front page nothing but man's failure.
Chief Justice Earl Warren 

Build your own satellite and have it launched into Space.

AmbaSat-1 is a tiny Space satellite kit that you launch yourself
¯\_(ツ)_/¯




The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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