Good News and Bad News
The drill sergeant making his morning announcements to a group of newcomers in a training camp, stated: "Today, gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news.
First, the good news Private Peters will be setting the pace on our morning run.
With this the platoon was overjoyed, as Private Peters was overweight and terribly slow...
...but then the drill sergeant finished his statement:
"Now for the bad news. Private Peters will be driving a truck".