Saturday 25th May 2019 - 01:48:29 

Caught In The Act

 

Sheila comes home early from work one day only to find her husband, Mark, in bed with a woman.

Sheila says "That's it, I'm leaving and never coming back."

Mark says "Don't you at least want to hear my explanation?"

Sheila shrugs and says "Fine, let's hear your story."

Mark says "I'm driving along the street when I see this young lady in torn clothes, no shoes, all muddy and crying. I took pity on her and asked if she would like to get cleaned up in my house.

She climbed into my truck and I brought her home. She took a shower, I gave her the underwear that doesn't fit you anymore, the blouse I bought you 2 years ago that you never wore, the $150 Nike running shoes you bought but never used - I even gave her some of the roast beef you had in the fridge, but didn't serve to me.

I showed her to the door. She thanked me profusely. As she was about to leave she turned around and asked me, 'Is there anything else your wife doesn't use anymore?'"

Quotes for Today:

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
 


Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born?
Benny Hill 


Having only modest talent is no excuse for not using it. Think what the morning would be like if only talented birds sang!
Anonymous 

This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯




The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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