Selected Quotations

• 
  If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
  
• 
  If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough.
  Mario Andretti
• 
  If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
  
• 
  If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
  
• 
  If random wit was easy then we wouldnt need Comedians.
  
• 
  If the going gets easier, you might be going downhill.
  
• 
  If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
  
• 
  If you can learn before hand then there is no need to waste time making mistakes.
  JustJooz
• 
  If you can't be happy where you are, it's a cinch you can't be happy where you ain't.
  
• 
  If you don't find it in the Index,look very carefully through the entire catalogue.
  Consumer's Guide, Sears, Roebuck and Co. (1897)
• 
  If you don't find it in the Index,look very carefully through the entire catalogue.
  Consumer's Guide, Sears, Roebuck and Co. (1897)
• 
  If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.
  
• 
  If you don't risk anything you risk even more.
  Erica Jong
• 
  If you have never made a mistake, then you have never done anything of significance.
  
• 
  If you have something to say, raise your hand ... and place it over your mouth
  
• 
  If you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth the £20.
  
• 
  If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
  Dorothy Parker
• 
  If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
  Seymour Cray (1925-1996), father of supercomputing
• 
  If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light. Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears.
  Glenn Clark
• 
  If you've got nothing nice to say, what the hell is wrong with you!?!
  
• 
  Impossible is just someone's opinion
  
• 
  Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings'.