Selected Quotations

• 
  Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat drinking beer all day.
  
• 
  Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  
• 
  Give us clear vision that we may know where to stand and for what to stand, because unless we stand for something we shall fall for anything.
  Peter Marshall
• 
  Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
  Jimmy DeMaret
• 
  Grove giveth and Gates taketh away.
  ... on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep up with software demands
  Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet)
• 
  Guess, how to make your dreams come true.... Wake Up!!!
  
• 
  Happiness is an empty sac!
  
• 
  Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
  
• 
  Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born?
  Benny Hill
• 
  Having only modest talent is no excuse for not using it. Think what the morning would be like if only talented birds sang!
  Anonymous
• 
  He that will make a good use of any part of his life must allow a large part of it to recreation.
  John Locke
• 
  He used statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts; for support rather than illumination.
  Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
• 
  Hindsight is an exact science.
  
• 
  How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
  
• 
  How did a fool and his money GET together?
  
• 
  I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.
  Richard Jeni
• 
  I always turn to the sports page first. The sports page records people's accomplishments; the front page nothing but man's failure.
  Chief Justice Earl Warren
• 
  I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.
  
• 
  I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me.
  
• 
  I am not young enough to know everything.
  Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
• 
  I deserve someone who likes me for who I am pretending to be.
  Arj Barker
• 
  I do know everything, just not all at once. It's a virtual memory problem.