A Scottish Colonel And The Condom
The chemist opens it and finds an old condom with a hole in it.
The colonel says 'how much to repair it'?
The chemist says '70p I guess'.
The colonel says 'how much for a new one'.
The chemist replies '£1'.
Tthe scotsman walks back outside and a few seconds later there is a loud cheer followed by a louder cheer. The colonel walks back inside and says 'the battalion has decided, we'll take a new one'.