Sunday 2nd April 2023 - 02:47:50 

A Very Fishy Groaner To Beat Them All


A chap is fishing and hooks a salmon, he reels it in and is just going to kill it for his dinner when the salmon looks at him and says "Hey mate, don't kill me, I'm only a baby, I haven't swum the 7 seas yet, Gis a chance pal".

The man looks at the salmon "You can talk"?

"Course I can, go on put me back, there's much bigger fish under the bridge".

"All right", says the man,"I'll put you back, what's your name"?

"Rusty" says the salmon,"And yours"?


He puts the fish back in the water and resolves to say nothing of this to anyone, fearing that he'll become a laughing stock.

About ten years later he's fishing in the same spot and he hooks a monster. It takes him two hours to land it. He looks at it and pictures it on his dinner plate. Just then the salmon opens one eye and looks at him "Dave, is that you"?

"Rusty, I don't believe it, it must be 10 years since I let you go, what you been doing"?

"well Dave, I've had a fantastic time, I've swum the seven seas and all the oceans. In fact, I've just come across the Atlantic, but I was really disturbed".

"Why's that Rusty"?

"Well, I was half way across and a voice told me to swim deeper, so I did, deeper and deeper and I found this huge shipwreck. I counted 4 funnels, it felt like death so I had to leave".

"Wow rusty, that was the Titanic it sank and almost all on board were drowned".

"Ah, I knew it, in fact, I was so upset I had to sit down and write a poem about it" said Rusty.

"A poem, don't talk daft, you're just a fish, how can you write a poem, that's rubbish".

"No Dave, really, it's available in all bookshops now".

"Ok" says Dave, "so what's it called then"?

"Salmon Rustys titanic verses".

Didn't you believe me?

Quotes for Today:

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

How did a fool and his money GET together?

I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.
Richard Jeni  

Build your own satellite and have it launched into Space.

AmbaSat-1 is a tiny Space satellite kit that you launch yourself

The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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