An Irishman And His Leprechaun
He then pulls a small green-skinned man out of his pocket and puts him on the counter.
As he's drinking one drink and the green man is drinking the other, an Englishman down the bar who has had a few too many drinks says, "Hey Paddy!, what's that little green thing you've got down there?"
The little green man runs down the bar and gives the Englishman a raspberry, "SPLBLBLBLT!," right in the face and then runs back to the Irishman.
The Englishman mops himself off and says to the Irishman, "Hey Paddy!, what is that thing, anyway?"
The Irishman replies, "Have some respect. He's a leprechaun."
"A leprechaun!" says the Englishman laughing, "Boy, I never knew leprechauns were so ugly!"
The leprechaun runs down the bar and gives the Englishman a raspberry again- SPLBLBLBLBT!
This time the Englishman is really mad!
"Tell that leprechaun that if he does that again I'll cut his pecker off!" he shouts.
"You can't do that" says the Irishman. "Leprechauns don't have peckers."
"How do they pee, then?" asks the Englishman.
"They don't," says the Irishman. "They go SPLBLBLBLBT!"