An Irishman At The Pearly Gates
"And you are...?" St. Peter asks.
"I'm Kevin O'Conlan," replies the Irishman.
"Hmm, O'Conlan...O'Conlan..." the gatekeeper mused, poring over his compendious list of people and events. "Ah, here we are. Kevin O'Conlan... you're a member of the Irish Republican Army".
"Yeh, that'd be me", replies Kevin.
"You blew up that pub in London"!
"You also blew up a bus in Belfast and a munitions transport in Northumberland".
"Yeh, that's all me work", comes the nonplussed reply.
St. Peter is just amazed at this guy, and when he finally finds words, he blurts, "Well, good God, man, we just can't let you in here"!
"Let me in, Hell"! says Kevin. "I come to tell you you've got ten minutes to get out"!