Biggest Lies And Porky Pies

I’ll respect you in the morning.

I’m from your government, and I am here to help you.

You get this one, I’ll pay next time.

It’s not the money, it’s the principle of the thing.

Trust me, I’ll take care of everything.



My wife doesn’t understand me.

Of course I love you.

I am getting a divorce.

Drinking? Why, no, Officer.

I never inhaled.

I gave at the office.

She means nothing to me.

I never watch television except for PBS.

Don’t worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge
is on “empty.”

Don’t worry, he’s never bitten anyone.

I’ll call you later.

…but we can still be good friends.

We’ll release the upgrade by the end of the year.

Read my lips: no new taxes

I’ve never done anything like this before

Now, I’m going to tell you the truth

It’s supposed to make that noise.

I *love* your new...