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Buying My First Condoms

 

The first time I went to a drug store to buy condoms, I was served by a beautiful young woman who asked what size I wanted. I said "I wasn't sure".

So she asked now big I was and I said, "Compared to what"?

She held up one finger and asked if I was that big.

I said, "I'm bigger than that".

Then she held up two fingers and asked if I was that big.

I said, "I'm bigger than that".

Then she held up three fingers and asked if I was that big.

I said, "I'm about that big".

She put the three fingers in her mouth and said, "You're a medium".

Quotes for Today:

Discipline is remembering what you want.
David Campbell 


Do everything you can to be a happy person, right now. If you think you can grouse today and then be happy someday... in the future, I'm here to tell you that happiness just doesn't work that way. Putting off happiness until 'someday' lasts forever.
 


Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
Scottish Proverb 


¯\_(ツ)_/¯     ¯\_(ツ)_/¯




This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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