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Computer Quotes

 

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Emo Philips

Bill Gates is the pope of the personal computer industry. He decides who's going to build.
Larry Ellison

Computer science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
Edsger Dijkstra

Computers are magnificent tools for the realization of our dreams, but no machine can replace the human spark of spirit, compassion, love, and understanding.
Louis Gerstner

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
Pablo Picasso

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
Andy Rooney

Computing is not about computers any more. It is about living.
Nicholas Negroponte

Data is not information, information is not knowledge, knowledge is not understanding, understanding is not wisdom.
Clifford Stoll

Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.
Doug Larson

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
Dave Barry

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
Isaac Asimov

I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image.
Stephen Hawking

I think it's fair to say that personal computers have become the most empowering tool we've ever created. They're tools of communication, they're tools of creativity, and they can be shaped by their user.
Bill Gates

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.
Steve Wozniak

Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest.
Isaac Asimov

People think computers will keep them from making mistakes. They're wrong. With computers you make mistakes faster.
Adam Osborne

Supercomputers will achieve one human brain capacity by 2010, and personal computers will do so by about 2020.
Ray Kurzweil

The computer is a moron.
Peter Drucker

The digital revolution is far more significant than the invention of writing or even of printing.
Douglas Engelbart

The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. The bad news is that they do what you tell them to do.
Ted Nelson

The Internet is not just one thing, it's a collection of things - of numerous communications networks that all speak the same digital language.
Jim Clark

The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers.
Sydney J. Harris

Think? Why think! We have computers to do that for us.
Jean Rostand

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Robert Orben

Treat your password like your toothbrush. Don't let anybody else use it, and get a new one every six months.
Clifford Stoll

What do we want our kids to do? Sweep up around Japanese computers?
Walter F. Mondale

Why is it drug addicts and computer afficionados are both called users?
Clifford Stoll

Quotes for Today:

Archaeologists have finally come up with an explanation as to why man eventually began walking upright. To free up their hands for masturbation.
 


Arguing on the Internet is like running in the Special Olympics, even if you win you're still retarded
 


At the party last night, i asked every husband to go stand next to the person who made his life worth living... the bartender was almost crushed to death. :)
 

This can save your bacon
¯\_(ツ)_/¯




The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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