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Cosmetic Surgery - The Full Works

 

A woman named Sandra was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it"?

God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live".

Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it.

She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years"?

God replied, "Shirley! I'm sorry but I didn't recognize you"!


Did not recognise you



Another good one from: Sunny

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯     ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



This can save your bacon
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Quotes for Today:

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
 


Give us clear vision that we may know where to stand and for what to stand, because unless we stand for something we shall fall for anything.
Peter Marshall 


Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
Jimmy DeMaret  


The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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