Courtesy Of The Big Yin - Billy Connolly For Those Not In The Know.
A trainee paratrooper is standing at the door feeling queezy.
The Sarn'tmajor says "jump you wimp".
"But what if my 'chute doesn't open"?
"You've a reserve 'chute, and if that doesn't work, just shout Allah Allah"!
So para jumps and his 'chute fails, as does his reserve, so he shouts "Allah, Allah" and a big brown hand comes out of the clouds, catches him and puts him safely on the ground.
"Thankk F**K for that, Jesus was that close"!
and a big brown foot comes out of the clouds and squishes him.
The Sarn'tmajor says "jump you wimp".
"But what if my 'chute doesn't open"?
"You've a reserve 'chute, and if that doesn't work, just shout Allah Allah"!
So para jumps and his 'chute fails, as does his reserve, so he shouts "Allah, Allah" and a big brown hand comes out of the clouds, catches him and puts him safely on the ground.
"Thankk F**K for that, Jesus was that close"!
and a big brown foot comes out of the clouds and squishes him.