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First Timer

 

The young, virgin boy from Alabama drives to the big city in search of a prostitute. He finds one and explains he has never had sex before.

The hooker says, "No problem, honey," and undresses the boy, then herself, and lies down on the bed. He crawls on top of her.

"Okay, stick it in, honey...all the way in...now pull it out...now put it back in...now pull it out..."

"Tarnation, woman!" says the boy. "Will you make up your fucking mind?"

Quotes for Today:

Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else.
Sir James M. Barrie  


Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
 


O' wad some god the gif tae gi us, tae see ourselves as others see us
 


¯\_(ツ)_/¯     ¯\_(ツ)_/¯




This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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