Getting Home - You Just Cannot Win
"Why don't you ever wipe your feet before walking into the house?
I thought you said you were coming home at lunchtime today!
Where's the shopping I asked you to get on the way home?
You left the toilet seat up again this morning!
Don't you ever think of buying me flowers like you used to"? (etc.)
This goes on for nearly two hours and nothing John says or does seems to be right by her. By 7 PM, he has had enough. But he knows better than to argue back, so he tries a more tactical approach.
"Darling," he says, "Please, let's start again. I'll go back outside and shut the door. Then I'll open the door and come in. We can then pretend I've just come home. What do you think"?
"OK", Mary replies.
So John puts on his coat, goes outside, shuts the door, waits a minute, opens the door, and steps in with a smile on his face. He immediately announces, in a musical tone, "Oh, darling, I'm home"!
"And just where have you been?" says Mary, "It's past seven o'clock"!
Courtesy of HAH - prostatepointers.org