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How To Guess What Day A Woman Is Born

 

I was telling a girl in the pub about my uncanny ability to guess the day a woman was born just by feeling their breasts.

"Really?" she said. "Go on then... Try."

After about 30 seconds of fondling she began to lose patience.

"Come on," she demanded, "What day was I born?"

"Yesterday?" I replied.

Quotes for Today:

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
 


And God said 'Let there be light'. But then the program crashed because he was trying to access the 'light' property of a NULL universe pointer.
 


And remember...
Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 per cent probability you'll get it wrong.
 


¯\_(ツ)_/¯     ¯\_(ツ)_/¯




This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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