Thursday 16th August 2018 - 08:00:10 

Medical Definitions From The Irish

 

You just have to love the Irish, they put life in it's proper perspective!


Our friends in Ireland have the Lowest Stress rate because they do not take medical terminology serious, you are going to die anyway, so live life and drink till you cannot lift your own mug!
Irish Medical Dictionary

Artery     The study of paintings
Bacteria     Back door to a cafeteria
Barium     What doctors do when patients die
Benign     What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section     A neighborhood in Rome
Catscan     Searching for Kitty
Cauterize     Made eye contact with her
Colic     A sheep dog
Coma     A punctuation mark
Dilate     To live long
Enema     Not a friend
Fester     Quicker than someone else
Fibula     A small lie
Impotent     Distinguished, well known
Labor Pain     Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff     A Doctor's cane
Morbid     A higher offer
Nitrates     Cheaper than day rates
Node     I knew it
Outpatient     A person who has fainted
Pelvis     Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative     A letter carrier
Recovery Room     Place to do upholstery?
Rectum     Nearly killed him?
Secretion     Hiding something?
Seizure     Roman emperor?
Tablet     A small table
Terminal Illness     Getting sick at the airport
Tumor     One plus one more
Urine     Opposite of you're out



Contribution from: Howard

Quotes for Today:

If you've got nothing nice to say, what the hell is wrong with you!?!
 


Impossible is just someone's opinion
 


Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings'.
 

This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯




The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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