Tuesday 28th January 2020 - 01:37:11 

Selected Quotations

Famous & Inspirational Quotes

  • Error: Sector not found -- search behind couch? (Y/N)

  • Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

  • Every revolution evaporates and leaves behind only the slime of a new bureaucracy.

  • Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.

  • Fashion is all about eventually becoming naked.

  • Freaking intolerant BS! (man does intolerance piss me off!)

  • Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat drinking beer all day.

  • Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

  • Give us clear vision that we may know where to stand and for what to stand, because unless we stand for something we shall fall for anything.
    Peter Marshall 

  • Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
    Jimmy DeMaret  

  • Grove giveth and Gates taketh away.
    ... on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep up with software demands
    Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet)  

  • Guess, how to make your dreams come true.... Wake Up!!!

  • Happiness is an empty sac!

  • Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.

  • Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born?
    Benny Hill 

  • Having only modest talent is no excuse for not using it. Think what the morning would be like if only talented birds sang!

  • He that will make a good use of any part of his life must allow a large part of it to recreation.
    John Locke  

  • He used statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts; for support rather than illumination.
    Andrew Lang (1844-1912) 

  • Hindsight is an exact science.

  • How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

  • How did a fool and his money GET together?

  • I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.
    Richard Jeni  

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Build your own satellite and have it launched into Space.

AmbaSat-1 is a tiny Space satellite kit that you launch yourself

The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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