Thursday 2nd December 2021 - 22:56:33 

Tesco Burger Update


I ate some of Tesco's burgers last night...
They gave me the trots.
tesco burgers

I had a Tesco burger last night...
I've still got a bit between my teeth.

I just checked my burgers in the fridge...
And, they're off!

The bloke next to me in Asda's cafe ordered a burger.
The assistant asked if he wanted anything on it.
He replied "Five pounds each way".

When cooking Tesco burgers the correct term is not 'medium to rare', but 'good to firm'.

The German supermarket in Cowplain is selling burgers specially for children...
They're called 'My Lidl Pony'.

I hear the veggie burgers have been found to contain traces of uniquorn.

Sat here reading the label on these Aldi burgers.
It turns out they're fairly low in fat but surprisingly high in Shergar.

One man has already been hospitalised after eating the offending horse burgers.
His condition is described as 'stable'.

Good thing about these horse puns...
it's stopped all those sick Jimmy Saddle jokes

Build your own satellite and have it launched into Space.

AmbaSat-1 is a tiny Space satellite kit that you launch yourself

Quotes for Today:

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance

Life must be dedicated to a destiny, in order to have a meaning.
Jose Ortega Y Gasset 

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, martini in one hand, hamburger in the other, body used up, worn out and screaming GERONIMO! What a Ride!

The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

Fuelled by: CodeIgniter - ver: 3.1.11  Debug: / 0.61MB / 22:56:33 / 200 / No Errors