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The Divorce Hearing

 

Mr. and Mrs. Nearier come before the judge for their divorce hearing.

The judge says, "What are the grounds?"

Mrs. Nearier says, "Cruel and inhuman punishment. He tied me to the bed, forced me to sing Jingle Bells while he pissed all over me."

The judge says, "My God, that's horrible."

She says, "Yeah. He knows how much I hate that song."

Quotes for Today:

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
 


If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough.
Mario Andretti 


If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
 


¯\_(ツ)_/¯     ¯\_(ツ)_/¯




This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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