The Unemployed Married Couple
"Evening, love. Can I help you?"
"Er....yeah...er...how much for a w*nk?" says the man, in a state of nervous excitement. "Only I haven't got much money, see."
"Just a minute," she says and scuttles round to ask her husband: "Here, how much should I charge for a w*nk?"
"I don't know," he says. "A fiver, I guess."
Back she goes and tells the young man: "Five pounds for a good w*nk, love."
He says "OK, and ...er...how much for a blowj*b then?"
"Just a minute....." Round she goes again and asks her husband for the price.
"A blowj*b? Well, gotta be a tenner."
Back she goes to the car and duly reports "Ten pounds'll get you the best bj you've ever had, darlin'."
Says the man: "Oh, right. And for a shag, how much would that be?"
"Just a minute....." etc. etc.
Soon she's back at the car, feeling a little tired. "Well it's twenty quid for a full shag."
The young man looks disappointed and says "Oh dear, I've only got fifteen pounds on me. I'll have a blowj*b then."
So the woman gets in the car and he whips out his manhood. The colour drains from the woman's face. It's like a baby's arm holding an apple! "Just a minute" she says, and scuttling back to her husband says "Quick, love, lend us a fiver!"