The Unluckiest American Tourist In Ireland
When the tour arrives at Belfast he decides to go for a stroll with the aim of taking in this new culture.
After he's been walking for a while someone rushes up behind him and sticks a gun in his back.
The person says to the tourist "What are you, Catholic or Protestant?"
The American thinks to himself "Great - if I say I'm Catholic, this guy is sure to be Protestant.
If I say I'm Protestant, he's sure to be Catholic. Either way I'm dead."
Then he has a brain wave and says to the Guy, "actually I'm Jewish".
This, he thinks to himself will surely keep him safe.
The guy behind him then replies "Gee, I must be the luckiest Arab in Ireland."