Friday 17th August 2018 - 22:35:49 

Who Said Poetry Was Boring?

 

These are entries to a washington post competition asking for a two-line rhyme with the most romantic first line, and the least romantic second line:

  1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
    Marrying you has screwed up my life.

  2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
    That's why I always wake up screaming.

  3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
    This describes everything you are not.

  4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
    But I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.

  5. I thought that I could love no other
    -- that is, until I met your brother.

  6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
    But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
    empty, and so is your head.

  7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
    But don't take that paper bag off your face.

  8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
    Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

  9. My love, you take my breath away.
    What have you stepped in to smell this way?

  10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
    Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'

  11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
    Two parts vodka, one part lime.

Quotes for Today:

Impossible is just someone's opinion
 


Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings'.
 


In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.
Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut 

This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯




The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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