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Who Said That?

 

It was the first day of class and a new student named Pedro Martinez, the son of a Mexican restaurant owner, entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?' "

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Pedro, who had his hand up.

"Patrick Henry, 1775."

"Very good!" said the teacher. Now, who said, '...that the government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth'?"

Again, no response except from Pedro. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863."

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed! Pedro, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do!"

She heard a loud whisper, "Screw the Mexicans!"

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Pedro put his hand up. "Sam Houston, 1836."

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

The teacher glared and asked, "All right! Now, who said that?"

Again, Pedro answered, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

Now furious, another student yelled out, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"

Pedro jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to the teacher, "Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

A voice yelled out, "You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you!"

Pedro frantically yelled at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

The teacher fainted, and as the class gathered around her on the floor, someone mumbled, "Oh fuck, we're in BIG trouble now!"

Pedro whispered, "Saddam Hussein, 2003."

With that a boy threw a board eraser at Pedro. Another student shouted "Duck!"

The teacher, just coming to, asked, "Who said that?"

Pedro: "Dick Cheney, 2006!"

Quotes for Today:

Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.
 


Fashion is all about eventually becoming naked.
Unknown  


Freaking intolerant BS! (man does intolerance piss me off!)
 

This can save your bacon

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

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