Wednesday 4th November 2020 - 21:04:14 

As I Mature


I've learned that you cannot make someone love you.

All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and

give in.

I've learned that no matter how much I care,

some people are just assholes.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust,

and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about

fifteen minutes,

After that you better have a huge schlong.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting,

long after you think you're finished.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,

unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a

relationship is at first,

the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of

money to take its place!

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't

working in your house,

one of your kids did it.

I've learned that the people you care most about

in life are taken from you too soon,

and all the less important ones just never go away.

Build your own satellite and have it launched into Space.

AmbaSat-1 is a tiny Space satellite kit that you launch yourself

The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once!   So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers.

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